Roughly 50% of all marriages fail and many of those don’t even make it past the first year.  Understanding why this happens can be the  key to ensuring that your own marriage does not fail.

Some factors that contribute to the failure of a marriage include a lack of communication or poor communication, financial issues, children and even the circumstances in which the marriage initially took place.  All of these can exist in a healthy and enduring marriage but if they are not dealt with properly they can lead to the failure of the marriage.

Most importantly, when a couple marries for reasons other than true love the marriage may be doomed before it starts.

Communication is critical to the success of a marriage.  Without appropriate communication, conflict resolution becomes a difficult issue.  If the couple lacks the communication skills necessary to resolve their problems, then even the smallest problems can become insurmountable.

Good Communication allows a relationship to grow and thrive by giving the partners an opportunity to share their dreams, concerns, hopes and desires with each other.  Good Communication also gives the couple a healthy way to resolve their arguments.  If one or both partners lack effective communications skills it becomes difficult to resolve arguments because the couple is not able to understand each other’s points of view.

If the marriage is already in trouble, both partners in the marriage must be dedicated to working on their communication skills in order to improve or even salvage their marriage.

Love may conquer all but sometimes even love isn’t enough to save a marriage when there are significant financial concerns.  While financial concerns in and of themselves may not be the cause of a failed marriage the tension that financial concerns create is often the culprit in a failed marriage.  Financial concerns can be a heavy burden to bear and when a couple is struggling to meet their financial obligations, there can be a tremendous amount of pressure in the relationship.  This pressure may be enough to destroy an otherwise healthy marriage.

If one of the partners in the marriage becomes obsessed with the marital finances they can begin to neglect other aspects of the marriage.  This neglectful behaviour can have the effect of making the spouse feel ignored and lonely.

Even the circumstances surrounding the marriage can lead to its failure.  A marriage of convenience is often not a healthy marriage.  When the decision to marry is based on something other than true love, it is likely that the marriage will fail.

Some examples of marriage circumstances that may lead to failure may include getting married because there is a baby on the way or because the couple is feeling pressured to get married by friends and family members.  Neither of these reasons is a truly valid.

Marrying too young is another reason why many marriages fail.  While the right age to marry varies greatly depending on the person, many people argue that the teens and early twenties are too early to get married.  Getting married before you have had a chance to enjoy many of life’s experiences can result in resentfulness in the marriage and can be the cause of failure of the marriage.

Another reason why many marriages fail is that society no longer places importance on the institution of marriage.  Today it is common for couples to live together and have children without being married.  With this lessening value placed on marriage in today’s society, couples may not be as strongly committed to making their marriage work and may be quicker to give up on the marriage and each other.

If any of these issues are present in your relationship maybe it would be helpful for you to take a closer look at your relationship and, if needed, seek some assistance to ensure that you don’t become one of the statistics.

So until next time – Relate with Love