Having a happy marriage doesn’t necessarily come easily just because you love each other. While love is very important in a marriage sometimes it just isn’t enough and you have to work at your marriage just like any other relationship.
Marriage is a multi-faceted relationship that needs to be nurtured in all of its capacities in order to be successful. Even the more mundane tasks such as household chores and paying the bills can factor into the well-being of your marriage.
1. Both of you in the marriage must be prepared to put your partner’s happiness ahead of your own from time to time for the marriage to truly work. Sometimes this requires being willing to make sacrifices for each other for the good of the marriage. If either of you is completely self-centred and unwilling to make sacrifices it will likely create resentment in the marriage.
At times the sacrifices may be big but most often it’s the smaller things that matter most. Even preparing a dish that you don’t like but that you know your spouse likes lets your partner know that you care and are willing to put their happiness first at times.
2. While making sacrifices is important in a happy marriage, it is also important to sometimes do things that are just for you. It’s great to have a lot of common interests but it’s also essential to have some things that you enjoy doing on your own.
Having some separate activities gives you a little time away from your partner once in a while and gives you a chance to realize how much you miss them when you are apart. It also gives you an opportunity to explore things on your own and prevents boredom in the relationship.
3. Another secret to a happy marriage is to maintain an intimate and affectionate relationship. Sharing physical closeness will keep your marriage happy. Even small gestures such as hugs or holding hands give you the opportunity to reconnect with your spouse on a daily basis.
4. Finances can cause a great deal of stress in a marriage so it is important to do your best to ensure that you do not allow your financial situation to come between you.
When financial concerns arise it is important to discuss the problems so that both of you are aware of what is going on and to work on establishing a budget together. Working together on this issue will make sure that neither of you feels left out of the decision making process and neither of you bears the stress of worrying about finances on your own.
5. Sharing household chores is another secret to a happy marriage. If either of you feels as though you are taking on too much responsibility in the household it can lead to resentment.
Not only does sharing these responsibilities prevent resentment but it also gives you an opportunity to work as a team which strengthens your bond. Both of you need to take an active role in completing household chores and letting your partner know if you are beginning to feel overburdened so some new decisions can be made.
6. It’s also important that you let your partner know if they have said or done something to hurt you. Failure to do so will allow the problem to continue which may in turn cause further problems.
If you bottle up your feelings your partner will be unaware of what they have done and may be likely to repeat their actions. You also may begin to avoid your partner because you are angry and you don’t want to start a confrontation. Your partner in turn may sense you behaving differently and be annoyed by your behaviour.
7. Understanding that you and your partner won’t always be in complete agreement is also critical to a happy marriage. While you may agree on a lot of things it’s unrealistic to believe that you and your partner will be in sync at all times. It’s okay to disagree sometimes as long as you respect each other’s feelings and beliefs and do not think that any one disagreement will be the end of the relationship.
8. Spontaneity is also an important part of a happy marriage. Allowing yourselves to fall into a predictable pattern can lead to boredom but being spontaneous at times will prevent boredom from setting in and keep the relationship interesting.
9. Maybe most important of all the skills in marriage is open communication. Without communication the relationship will continually struggle.
It’s important to be honest with your partner and share your concern and to listen to what your partner has to say while making an effort to understand their point of view before responding.
Communicating about problems and concerns is important but it’s also important to communicate about your daily lives and even your aspirations for your personal future.
10. Finally, remembering why you married your partner is one of the most important secrets of a happy marriage. Always keep in mind what it is about your partner that drew you to them in the first place will make certain that you never forget your love for your partner. It will also ensure that they are always beautiful in your eyes.
Many things may change throughout the course of your marriage but the one thing that will always remain is the reason you fell in love in the first place.
A happy marriage is not guaranteed no matter how much you each love each other. There are so many variables that can have an effect on the happiness and success of the marriage. However it is important that both of you realize that you must continuously work on all of these aspects if you want your marriage to remain a happy and healthy one.
So until next time – Relate with Love